Another new year, another resolution? Did you make one? Do you know people who have? Allow me to make a prediction, and it’s this: that very few resolutions made will become a reality. I’m confident about this because for over 20 years I have coached and trained people who want personal change but had failed to do so, especially at New Year.
The New Year is supposed to hold some special magic that success will come with a new start to a calendar year. Yet resolutions to lose weight, stop smoking, start a business, write a book, etc, etc, fail for a number of reasons, but they all boil down to a lack of self-control. This means being more consciously aware of your thoughts and actions, and changing them to create and bring about the new version of yourself.
Many people lack enough self-control to achieve the things they really want. This is because the act of personal change requires effort. It may also require a change of beliefs about what you think is possible, and about your view of the world and other people. It may require a shift in values that often means breaking away from societal norms. You will be acting and speaking differently, and this can sometimes cause others to treat you with caution or suspicion. So your relationships will change. You will also need to beak some habits that have not been serving you well.
Self-control is driven by determination. What sometimes triggers people into personal change is the straw that breaks the camel’s back, somewhere inside a voice says ‘enough is enough’, or it can be that something suddenly becomes really important, and achieving it will bring a better/happier life for self or for others.
There’s also the ‘I’m a failure’ syndrome, where a person attempts change and because they tried before and failed, each new failure becomes a barrier to change as you don’t want to feel a failure yet again.
When a person is resolute about making a change, and they are ready for the change, they won’t wait for New Year – the time is now. Change happens when all the ingredients are there – an important reason, a worthwhile outcome, aligned beliefs, determination and self-control.
So do you think that overnight, when the calendar turns to 2018, there is enough magic to make it happen? Maybe, if you are ready for the change you seek at this time.
You will know when it’s time to improve and develop yourself. You will know when enough is enough. You will know when the future you desire is far more exciting and compelling than the present. The question is – will you act?
Happy New Year!